Robo-Vac

My colleague Alanah keeps a vacuum cleaner in her classroom. It's an old and heavy blue upright model just like the one that I used to keep in my classroom, so I commented on it.

"We have about five more at home," she said. I don't imagine Alanah as a woman who spends a lot of money on anything, especially vacuum cleaners, so I was surprised. I must have betrayed my surprise because she explained, "My husband collects vacuum cleaners."

Strange but true. The next day, she told me about Robo-Vac.

"Robo-Vac was a computerized vacuum cleaner. Mark was especially proud of it. It was low and flat, like a disc, and we could program it to vacuum the house, which it did each morning at 6:30 when we left. "

Alanah and Mark have two dogs and a cat, so it was great to have the carpets vacuumed every day. Robo-Vac would make happy R2D2 sounds when it vacuumed. It would go forward until it hit a wall or a chair leg, and then it would back up. In this way, it would map the room, and because it was so flat, it could vacuum under chairs and tables, so it was thorough.

One Saturday morning, Mark woke up, looked into the hall, and slammed the bedroom door. "Don't go out there," he said. "I have to think."
One of the dogs had gotten sick during the night and had diarrhea in the hall. Robo-Vac, in doing its Saturday morning vacuuming, spread the feces over every inch of the house.

Mark and Alanah spent the weekend mopping (yes, mopping) and re-mopping their carpets.

Robo-Vac died.

Wouldn't you?